Im not saying that every aspect of motherhood is terrible. Quite the opposite. The joys far outweigh the horrors.
So what is the good stuff? Well there is so much that makes me happy every day. A lot if it would be completely insignificant to those who don’t have children and have no intention to. But its the little things really. It the waking up in the morning after a reasonable nights sleep(feel free to replace reasonable with 'shitty', 'non-existent' or just 'damn awful') and hearing a chirpy happy baby, or in my case, two chirpy babies, chatting and talking to each other. Then the morning cuddles are pretty good too. Sleepy boy cuddles are the best. For one, they are too tired to try and escape so you've got a good chance here of a fairly decent one.
Its also the little piles of creation left around the house that you unsuspectingly find days later. Thing like a pot or a cup stuffed with tissue,or a cuddly toy sat reading a book. We've had a book tower construction, toy cats sat eating dinner from the cat bowls downstairs. Imaginary Christmas trees made from cushions and all sorts. The boys' imagination is really starting to show and some of the things they come up with are pretty cool. But at the moment they mostly revolve around cranes, towers and Christmas trees.
The talking is a real bonus we are starting to notice. Just being able to ask a question and get a 'yes' or 'no' is a major breakthrough as I am nearly able to put my crystal ball away!
Sam and Fin have only recently started to play and talk with each other. Ive seen a glimpse of what the future will be like with twins. They have their own private conversations which I cannot decipher. They will both go though a ritual of a game which I do not know the rules off so im better off staying away. I can just imagine that in a years time, they will be able to play board games together, play cowboys and Indians together. Any two person game, they already have a built in playmate.
So the bad? Well we have numerous trials each day. I think a lot of it is due to the fact that there is always two of them. The most the boys have spent apart from each other is when they are sleeping and even then they are usually right next to each other. We have a lot of fights. Im talking about one every hour. Usually these revolve around toys or which colour cups they want (*mental note to go back to Ikea for another set of the dog cups). To be fair the cup fights usually happen when getting their milk ready for bedtime.
We have a lot of 'mine, mine, mine'. Which turns to head wrestling (Uncle Gary would be pleased), which if left turns to biting. I have been letting a lot of the fights ride out recently though. I kind of figure that as long as it doesn’t get too violent, they need to learn to figure things out for themselves and get over it. Of course I will step in if the screaming gets too loud or I see biting. But anything other than that I will keep away.
One thing that I am really struggling with at the moment is indecisiveness. I really cannot keep patient when they cant make up their minds what they want. A general conversation goes along like this:
Fin: Uh Uh blanket blanket
Me: Oh you want your blanket?
Fin: Okay
Me: *Puts blanket on his lap
Fin: No no no blanket!!
Me: Okay *takes blanket off.
Fin: NO BBLLLAAANNNKKKET!!
Me: Okay, here you go
Fin: NO!
Me: What do you want?
Fin: ARRGGGGHHHHHHHH
Me: Do you want your blanket on or off?
Fin: BBBLLLAAANKKEETTTT!!
Me: * Walks away
Fin: NO BBLLLAAANNNKKKET!! ARRGGGGHHHHHHHH
I know in this game that I cannot win. If I walk away he feels abandoned and screams but if I stay, the argument will continue. This is a lose lose situation. In the end, the boys are probably past the capability of making their own decisions so I have to make it for them regardless of the screaming I will get back. Im getting screaming as it is so I may as well put a stop to hassle.
I could go on and on but it don't want this to drag out too much as I am sure across the whole world, everyone who is currently raising a toddler is going through the exact same thing, so to finish, I will leave you with this, and Im sure you will agree, its pretty spot on!
